Wednesday, October 24, 2007

it might be lack of sleep, but i find this article hilarious

Msnbc advises all of America how to be paranoid freaks in

Soap up! The 12 germiest places in your life

Among the tastier of quotes (italics are mine):

"There are often traces of E. coli or fecal bacteria on the faucets and door handles because it’s hard to wash hands in the tiny sinks. And the volcanic flush of the commode tends to spew particles into the air, coating the floor and walls with whatever had been swirling around in it."

"After using the toilet, wash and dry your hands thoroughly, and use a paper towel to handle the toilet seat, lid, tap and doorknob. Put the lid down before you flush. If there’s no lid, turn your back to the toilet while flushing and beat a hasty retreat."

"Transfer wet laundry to the dryer quickly so germs don’t multiply, wash underwear separately (there’s about a gram of feces in every pair of dirty underwear) and dry for at least 45 minutes. Wash your hands after laundering." [Ew. Ew. A gram? Never mind that the stat immediately calls to mind visuals of other substances usually weighed out in such units lurking in one's briefs; perhaps people should just put more effort into effective wiping habits rather than freaking out about the two-second transfer from washing machine to dryer.]

"Many stores have dispensers with disinfectant wipes near the carts. If your store doesn’t, bring your own wipes and give the handle a quick swab. Or carry along a cart cover like the Grip-Guard or Healthy Handle." [OK, what the hell? I know I've been out of the States for a while, but seriously. It's come to this?]

"A recent study tested various surfaces for the cold virus after a group of sick people had stayed overnight and found the virus on the remote, door handles, light switches, pens and faucet handles.

Reduce the risk: Clean the remote control, phone, clock radio, door handles and light switches with germicidal wipes."

[Yeah, I'm glad we have the resources to conduct studies that can make the brilliant conclusion that "a group of sick people" contaminated a room they stayed in. And now everybody, run out to your local Wal-Mart and stock up on germicidal wipes. Since when was "germicidal wipe" even a term?]

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